Kuang (kuang) wrote in saucer_of_milk,

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'are you happywithyourwashhhhh'.. *

Clipboard street marketers.. don't you just love them?

'Yes madam, I personally would be glad to take hard earned time out from my lunchbreak to work unpaid for your company, providing information that will allow them to make money yet affording me no benefits whatsoever'.

It also annoys me that they size you up in an instant and fit you into their pre-decided demographic group before approaching you - the only questions I ever get are about booze and fags, which is laughable as I neither drink nor smoke. It's the aura of slinkyrawkstarness that does it, I think ;) Doesn't it occur that the opinions of those unconverted to your product are just as useful if not moreso than the opinions of those who already use it?

I also have problems with mobile charidee collectors too - they're never content with 'I set aside a given amount each month and give it to charities of my choice, and if on one or more occasions your name comes up, then you'll get some - otherwise you can safely assume I *don't* wish to set up a direct debit right now with somebody I've never met to help a charity I know nothing about'.

Hmm, who else... ah yeah, Hari Krishnas.

'I'm happy with my worldview thanks and I really don't have time to get into a debate now'
'Can I just get you to say a Gouranga then?'
'Well, no.. that's your thing, not mine'
'But it would make me very happy if you said it for me'
'Well, if I was a catholic I'd probably be very happy if you'd give me a hail mary, but I don't see that happening'..

But the absolute worst of the bunch have to be the direct sellers. These generally fall into two categories:

1) 'Buy this product, it's wonderful! it songs, it dances, it cures all ills...'

to which the typical kuang response is 'if it was any good I'd already heard of it. What sort of company thinks that one-to-one sales in the street is the most effective and cost efficient way to make their product known?', and

2) 'Make money from home, you'll be rich, it's great!'

which begs the question 'Am I to assume then that your wonderful home working scheme pays less than standing in the street giving out leaflets, otherwise you'd be doing it as well, and if so why don't you just give me a few of those leaflets too and I'll do your job instead!'

* Eddie Izzard-ism, from Unrepeatable. Watch it! :)
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